Fifty Shades of Grey, the erotic fan fiction based on the Twilight series (itself a fan fiction of vampiric mythos), dominated the hearts and minds of housewives and fans of awful literature worldwide ever since Brit author E. L. James decided to commit her writing to print in 2011 — and like all best-selling books, it was inevitably processed into the Hollywood machine.
Set for release this Valentine’s Day, Sam Taylor-Johnson’s highly anticipated silver screen adaptation — starring Jamie Dornan as mysterious billionaire Christian Grey and Dakota Johnson as willing BDSM participant Anastasia Steele — already set tongues wagging and eyebrows furrowing when it was reported that 20 percent of the film will comprise of sex scenes, almost 20 minutes of hot and heavy action.
Considering the risqué nature of the film that got itself banned in neighbouring Malaysia and Indonesia, it was only natural to consider that Singapore’s Media Development Authority (MDA) might smite it down too, or at least allow the film to screen in a heavily-censored state. Fortunately for fans here, Fifty Shades Of Grey will open in theatres here tomorrow completely uncut, albeit carrying an R21-rating for mature themes and sexual scenes.
However, gaze deeper into the abyss of MDA’s classification information for Fifty Shades Of Grey, and you’ll find that the agency has inadvertently written a commendably vivid literotica based on the erotic film that was based on an erotic book that was based on a thinly-veiled erotic homage to vampires.
Blush on as MDA efficiently translates the film’s sex scenes into succinct literary descriptions:
” …the male protagonist is shown tying the female protagonist’s hands to restrain her movement, prior to caressing her body with tools like feathers or a flogger to sexually arouse her. Some spanking and whipping are also shown, but these are either implied or kept brief. In one of the stronger scenes, the male protagonist undresses the woman and whips her with a belt as a form of punishment. The whipping is not enacted on screen with the impact conveyed through the woman’s pained expression. In another fairly prolonged scene, the male protagonist handcuffs the woman to a metal structure and hits her with a leather crop before tying her hands to a bed post and thrusting against her from behind. Female upper body nudity and sexual thrusting can also be seen in the sexual scenes.”
According to the agency, the visual portrayals of BDSM practices are justified and left uncut as (spoiler alert!) Steele eventually comes to the conclusion that the whole thing’s kinda fucked up and ultimately rejects Grey in the end. Catch the film in cinemas tomorrow if MDA’s got you all hot and bothered about it — just don’t be weirded out when you feel the air in the theatre turn moist.
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